Obi-Wan Apologizes
by BeautifulArbiterDreamland
Summary: Qui-Gon makes Obi-Wan apologize to Luke about lying to him about his family and makes him teach Luke and Leia how to be Jedi through dreams. The result is confusion for the Empire and the Rebellion and hilarity for Luke and Leia. Feel free to give ideas, and this story may not be that long.
1. The Sign to Lord Vader

Disclaimer #1: Did not create Star Wars

Disclaimer #2: Am not sticking fully to cannon Clone Wars

Disclaimer #3: Am not doing this with much serious intent. Writing this as I get inspiration, and this was how it started. I've always liked the idea of call signs used to identify the perpetrator of the crime/ criminal.

If you have any ideas, please do not hesitate to give them

* * *

Lord Vader stalked into the decimated room that had doctors and investigators scurrying all over it. The man in charge of the Investigation saw him enter and hurried to meet Vader before he came too far into the room. There were things that had to be explained.

"Lord Vader! May I have a moment of your time?" The man knew he could die, but he would rather die than have Vader blame his men for the failure to find the culprit. It was not their fault the perpetrator had been invisible.

"You may, Inspector."

"We still do not know what happened." He took a deep breath. "We have two video control rooms that watch each other to make sure no one slacks in their duties. Neither one did-"

Lord Vader cut the man off. "Get to the point, Inspector. I do not have all day."

"The murderer was invisible. We were not hacked, and the video feed matches up with the one witness who survived. The heads fell off the generals and were cauterized before they hit the ground. We believe a lightsaber did the deed, but saw no evidence of it being used."

Vader stayed silent as the Inspector finished the odd tale, and whether the… man?… was waiting for more information or thinking about what he had been given, the Inspector had no idea. He stayed silent for a few moments more, just in case, before dropping the last piece of information.

"The murderer left a call sign that dates to the Clone Wars. It lies this way."

Determined, the man turned and walked towards the burned metal that stayed outside the cameras ability to see. He did not look to see if Vader followed him, because he knew that the Commander of the Imperial fleet would want to see the sign if the rumors that he fought in the Clone Wars were true. True to the man's instinct, Vader did follow. Doctors and investigators cleared out of the way, a few of them knowing how big a moment this would be.

Reaching the call sign, the Inspector just stepped to the side and said nothing. He knew that Vader would know what it meant. He was right once again. The sign that was melted into a wall by what was most likely a lightsaber, λασς, was a sign that Vader knew well, except the first letter, which explained itself to the man.

"There is another Skywalker." The tone of his voice was indescribable, thanks to the vocoder. Was it awed, scared, angry, reverent, or indifferent? None of them knew, but the Inspector was determined to not let this get back to the Emperor unless Vader told the man himself. He knew this was meant for Vader, and Vader alone.

As the Commander of the Imperial Fleet and the Emperor's Right Hand Man turned around and left the room, his job of finding out what happened finished, the Inspector did his best to fulfill his mental vow. He made every person who came in contact with the room promise to not tell another person of the sign or put it in any reports about the incident. It took almost two full days with no sleep and a lot of caffeine, but the honest man knew that it would turn out to be worth the effort. He further ruined the melted wall so that the sign would not be seen by those who would work with the wall later. He knew and felt that what had happened would be extraordinarily important, and things he knew without explanation were always true in some form or fashion. Just how true this feeling would turn out to be, he did not know


	2. Old Dead Guy Doesn't Know When To Stop

Disclaimer #1: Do not own Star Wars

Disclaimer #2: Do not actually know what I'm doing.

* * *

5 Days after the Battle of Yavin. So 5 Days into the first year of ABY. I think.

* * *

Luke was in a dream. He had to be, because Ben Kenobi was right in front of him.

"Hello again, Luke."

"Ben! I didn't know you could appear in dreams! That is so cool!"

Luke was so ecstatic that the old man couldn't help but smile at him, but still corrected him on his actual name. "My name is Obi-Wan, Luke. I used Ben as a pseudonym."

"Right," Luke smacked his palm to his forehead. "I'm sorry, Obi-Wan."

"Do not apologize. I should have… told you sooner. Should have corrected you sooner."

At this, Obi-Wan lost his smile and became serious in a way Luke had never seen him before, but he had not known him that long. The now dead man started to pace, looking like a man on a mission trying to figure out the best tactic to beat the enemy. The enemy, in Obi-Wan's case, an also dead master who was good at causing guilt and remorse when he wanted to see a wrong righted. While Luke's gut did not tell him this little tid-bit, his gut did tell him that what was going to happen would be big. And, based off Luke's previous luck, most likely bad.

Obi-Wan started to explain, hoping he would get the words right. "I have not been entirely truthful with you Luke. It took… another dead Jedi explaining that what I did was… wrong for me to come to my senses."

Here he paused, running a hand through his hair, and Luke took his chance to interject. "What have you not been truthful with me about, B- Obi-Wan." Luke stammered over the other man's name, still getting used to the name he had not heard of before 5 days ago.

"I have lied to you in the worst way possible, and have kept you in the dark about your… familial situation," Obi-Wan thanked the Force for the young man's question, as it helped him continue talking about the subject and not back out. "Your… father is still alive, and you have a twin sister."

It was at this point, however, that an annoying beeping broke through the dream, signaling to Luke that it was time to get up. Obi-Wan could just feel his old master's disappointment through the Force at his failure to communicate the intended message.

"I will let you wake up, and I will come again when you are in a safe enough location."

Luke was jerked out of the dream by Wedge Antilles yelling at him for sleeping through his alarm once more and did not succeed in keeping in a groan because of the messed up nature of his life at the moment.

* * *

"So let me get this straight. Old wizard guy lies about your family situation, tells you the 'truth', but it isn't even the full truth? In a dream? How do you know he's telling the truth this time?"

Han hit the nail on its head, summing up why Luke was still struggling with what happened a week ago. Leia, who tried so hard to never agree with the smuggler on anything, nodded after he finished. She, at least, could put aside feelings of 'hatred' towards the man when faced with a common goal and problem: Helping Luke.

"He said he would come back and tell me when it was safe for him to do so, but it has been a week! I don't know what to do." Luke thumped his head on the table and moaned (whether from the pain of hitting his head, or the confusion laid before him, no one knows). "The best I can do is to assume that the Empire has my dad captive and that Vader is responsible while searching for a girl who was also born on the same day as me and probably has Force sensitivity."

Leia noticed that Luke avoided the problem of trust, but she also did not blame him. She did the same thing when overhearing the fact that she was adopted and still had biological family (Bail didn't specify whether the sibling was a boy or a girl. What a pity). So she made up her mind to help him where no one could help her.

"What day is your Life Day?"

She was already thinking of the routes of information she would use to search and how she would ask Mon Mothma for permission to sneak into an Imperial data base so that she could look through legal documents and-

"Empire Day. My Life Day is, of all days, the very day the blasted Empire was born."

Han laughed while Leia's planning ground to a halt. "That sucks, kid. What a day to be born on."

Leia's mind fired back up again and so she decided to impart wisdom an old, and now dead, friend imparted on her once she figured out that the Empire was born on the same day that she was. "I've been told that there is no better irony than for one who has been born with the Empire to be one of the ones to bring it to its knees," Leia took a deep breath, not looking at Luke or Han, but holding their attention all the same. "I was also born with the Empire, Luke. I was adopted, and the Empire itself killed my parents, separating me from any biological family I had left. The fact that I could one day be one of the Rebels to bring down the tyranny that rules our galaxy was sometimes my only consolation when I had been lied to and when everything seems at its worst."

The somber mood settled on the group for a few minutes, each of them thinking about what Leia had said and the revelations that had happened in the past 10 minutes, until Han decided that he had done enough serious thinking.

"Now wouldn't it be funny if the two of you were twins? The amount of money I would make off the bets about the two of you becoming a couple would be astronomical."


	3. Luke and Leia Talk

Hey! Did ya miss me? I've been busy with school.

Disclaimer #1: Do not own Star Wars

Disclaimer #2: Not doing this seriously. Just doing this for fun

I love reviews, though, and would like ideas for next chapters, although I do have one idea. If you got something, please don't hesitate to tell me.

* * *

Day 25 ABY

* * *

"So he finally came back?" Leia asked.

Luke rung his hands together nervously and nodded. He was still trying to process the dream Obi-Wan's catastrophic news. Taking a shaky breath, he replied with "Yes, and he… he finished what he was trying to tell me last time."

Luke sat on a chair that was across from Leia, and behind the desk that she had in her make-shift office. He still didn't know how to begin, but he for sure didn't want to lead with the actual news first.

"He told me that I would get dream training from already dead Jedi, but that I eventually would have to go see a Master Yoda to finish." Now on to the hard part. "He revealed my sister's identity, and who-where my father is."

Here, Leia interrupted him, sensing his panic. "If you would rather not tell me today, that is fine Luke. You do not seem to be taking the news well."

She tried to reach across the table to comfort him, but Luke pulled away, still not ready for comfort yet. Running a hand through his already messy hair, he began again. "Leia, Obi-Wan said that you are my twin sister and that V-"

Laughter rang out through the small office space that belonged to Princess Leia of the Dead World. The former farm boy looked at her in astonishment as she continued to shake with mirth. He could tell that it was not in derision, but to the reason of the response besides that, he was mystified.

"So… So Han… was right!"

A smile crossed Luke's face as he finally remembered the day that he told his two friends about the first weird dream that he had. In a joking manner, Han had stumbled onto the truth. The laughing lasted a few more seconds before dying out, although the good mood in either of them did not vanish.

"So what is the rest of your news? You'll be getting all sorts of teachers-"

"You'll be able to get these teachers too, if you want to learn." Luke interjected.

Leia's smile grew wider than it already had been. "And gain the ability to play amazing pranks on Han? Wouldn't miss it." So they were of the same mind then. A chuckle escaped Luke, before he remembered the biggest part of his news.

"The last part is about Anakin Skywalker. He… Vader didn't kill him, but from what I understand, he isn't really here either." He rubbed his face with his hands, not looking at Leia. He wasn't sure he could face her at the moment. "I don't know the history, and I am not sure how much of this I believe, but from what Obi-Wan told me, Anakin used the… Dark Side of the Force too much, and Fell. He became evil, and it… changed him, even his name, his identity. Anakin became Vader, and is Anakin no longer."

Instead of laughter, silence filled the small room this time, making it feel even smaller. Luke had just told his twin that their… biological father tortured her and made her watch the destruction of her home. They both felt how bad it was, but maybe Luke more than Leia, since she broke the silence first. Luke hadn't even talked to Obi-Wan after he told him what happened to his father.

"Can we prank Vader too?"

Yanking his head up so fast it nearly gave his whip-lash, Luke stared incredulously at Leia, who was obviously all to serious in her question.

"Think about it! Not only would we be making money off any bets we made about our relationship- Yes I know about them!- We would also make the Empire really confused and befuddled, which would in turn make the Alliance confused." Getting into her idea, Leia's eyes glowed with excitement while Luke stared at her, more than a little horrified. " We could get the Empire running in circles and the Alliance would simply be running after them…"

Luke quietly stood in his chair and edged towards the door right behind him, since he could tell that Leia was just brainstorming at this point and that would be better to just leave her alone. Sneaking out the door, he closed it as quietly as he could and started down the hall to his ship. It was almost time for his shift to start, and he had lost track of time talking to Leia about his dream. He hadn't even had time to eat.

* * *

It was a couple of hours into his surveillance flight, once they had finished with daily drills, that he finally got around to thinking again about his unfortunate parentage. His father had been a good pilot, and he saw that in action himself at Yavin, in the trench. However, without Luke Skywalker realizing it, Leia's mischievous mood had finally reached him, leading him to wonder if Obi-Wan could teach him any of Anakin's flying tricks so that he could confuse Vader when he faced him again in air battle. Maybe get a sign that they used in the Clone Wars and paint it on his ship… The possibilities were endless.

The twins were both cackling with glee at the prospect of bringing the fastidious Empire to its knees through pranks and confusion, while Obi-Wan and the other dead Jedi looked on with varying degrees of horror, anticipation, and confusion. The Emperor and Vader felt the glee through the Force, but being unable to pinpoint where it was coming from and for what reason it was being felt, were both feeling traces of fear that this glee would end up being directed at them. It doesn't take a genius to know that they would be right in that. Now, Yoda did not feel a thing, because the very old Jedi was taking a nap, and so missed the glee that would have frightened him as well. Which, for the twins, will turn out to be a very good thing. For the galaxy, the result will turn out to be disastrous.


	4. Palpatine gets a new robe

Hi guys! I've had end of the year stuff to do for school. Sorry that it's been a while.

1) I do not own Star Wars

2) This in not necessarily in order

3) I do like suggestions for future pranks or ideas for the story. I'm flying by the seat of my pants here.

* * *

1.5 ABY (It's been a year and a half since the twins discovered their relationship)

* * *

"This is _not_ how the twins were supposed to use their new Force abilities." Sighed Obi-Wan to Qui-Gon.

"Patience, my friend. It is possible they have an ulterior plan."

The two specters watch as Luke and Leia 'sneak' around the Emperor's palace, using what the dead Jedi have taught them in their dreams. The two have a very specific destination in mind, and this plan has been in the works for months, although this detail is not known to the people who can actually see them. The new Force abilities make them invisible to everyone who is not a highly trained Force sensitive, which is why the two were not actually making any efforts to stay hidden by quieting their giggles.

"All of these "little" pranks and… assassinations… have gotten out of hand! This isn't-"

Qui-Gon cuts Obi-Wan off, a frown beginning to mare his features. "Their tactics have been working better than any other tactics that have been taken against this monstrosity. The Empire is confused, weakened, and fractured. Luke and Leia's combined power have-"

"WHAT ARE THEY DOING?!" Obi-Wan yells as the twins, actually making sure they don't get caught now, quietly and carefully make their way into Palpatine's inner chambers, where the man (Do we call him a man, or a demon?) himself slept.

* * *

Palpatine wakes up slowly from some of the best sleep he's had in months (yes, the twins had something to do with it), and as he gets up and shuffles to the 'fresher to keep up the appearance that he is a normal human, he fails to notice that the slippers that he normally wears to protect his small and fragile feet have bunny ears and are now pink. In fact, although the Emperor of only most of the universe does not know this at the moment, all of the his clothes that could be found were turned from his usual black color to a shade of pink or lavender (Mostly hot pink though. Luke argues that it is the most attractive color). His aids were also unaware of this unusual development. Any and all dead Jedi crowded around the palace so that they could watch as the Emperor realized what had happened to his lovely, black, and intimidating cloaks. Even Obi-Wan would admit, later, that the reaction was priceless.

* * *

"Alright. It is time to get down to business."

When Mon Mothma spoke, everyone listened, and today was no different. The only big difference about today's meeting that didn't happen everyday was that the woman was smiling, but the Rebellion had not gone on the offensive in a few months and had won no major battles recently, which were the usual reason she smiled. So in reality, the only way in which today was the same as every other day was that people listened to the leader of the Alliance. Everything else was different, and Leia was pretty sure that she knew why.

"We do have the usual reports to make, but first I'd like to share something that is bound to make your day."

At this, the meeting hall burst into quiet whispers, because they _never_ went out of order. Even when they won a confrontation, they always made their reports in the designated order. Something was afoot.

"This report was sent to us by one of our deep cover agents inside the Emperor's palace, sharing something the rest of the galaxy will never see until this Empire is taken down." Mothma motioned to an officer behind her, and he walked outside the room for a moment and walked back with a data chip in his hand.

"_So it worked?_" Leia asked her brother through the mental connection that they shared.

"_It always works._"

Luke sent her a smile from across the room, trying to assure her that their efforts had not been in vain. He knew how much she hated failure of any kind.

"Please watch this video taken from the hidden camera that our agent has placed successfully within the Emperor's own chambers."

"_Wouldn__'t that be a little scarring to watch everyday?_" Luke asked the question this time.

"_She never said it wasn__'t."_

This was apparently the wrong thing to say as she saw the wheels turning in Luke's mind to think of new ideas that would inevitably flummox both the Empire and Rebellion. She interceded with a _"Pay attention"_ so that she could watch this (hopefully) comedy gold without distraction.

The room quieted and darkened as a video sprang to life on a screen that appeared behind Mon Mothma. At first, all anybody could see was a still and dark room without much definition. Then the lights turn on, revealing a lavish bedroom and a disgruntled Palpatine shielding his eyes from the light (probably because he's a demon and hates light). The old prune of a man shuffles over to a large set of double doors, showing the camera the pink, bunny slippers that Luke graced the old man with just a week before (it took a while to get the tape to the Rebellion leaders). The audience collectively gasped when they saw this, because it was the only thing he was wearing that wasn't black. When the double doors opened through use of the Force, the Emperor of most of the galaxy stood in stunned silence for roughly 5 seconds before screaming a hair-splitting, out-of-this-realm type of scream. To sum it up: a scream you never want to hear from anyone, ever. The wardrobe is full of hot pink cloaks that were usually black, and not a single thing was left untouched. Even some of Vader's spare parts that he kept in there for "safe keeping" were turned a different color, only this time it was lavender. That, of course, was Leia's doing.

Aids entered the room to figure out what was wrong and Palpatine used the Force to push them back out of the room so that they wouldn't see what had happened to him, humiliating him even further. He did all this while still screaming, and the aids were starting to wonder if the man needed breath. The easy explanation is that he was no mortal human, but they didn't know that. They, and the cyborg Vader who was came into the room, simply thought that the man had a good set of lungs on him. Vader walked over and deflected any Force attack by Palpatine so that he could see what also happened. With the last few seconds the film had left, it showed the enraptured Alliance members a Vader who could also scream, because some of his spare capes where hot pink or lavender, the twins personal gift to the cyborg.

The video turned off once the recording was over, and the room sat in silence for a few minutes before Mon Mothma took the front of the room again

"Now, let us commence with roll call…"

"_Totally worth it,_" the twins said in unison, both speaking of the punishment they received for not being accounted for last week. They also ignored a disappointed Obi-Wan standing behind Mon Mothma, as well as an ecstatic Jedi they never met before. The reader would know this particular Jedi to be Qui-Gon Jinn.


	5. Another General Down

Hello again! I'm sorry that it's been a while, but I was having computer problems. I am out of school but still have a busy summer ahead of me.

1) I do not own Star Wars. Just this.

2) This isn't in any order other than I thought of it and wanted to write it.

3) Suggestions for pranks are always welcome

* * *

2 ABY

* * *

This is the third one this week. Another Grand General has been decapitated and body burned, leaving behind only the head and the identification of the man and a symbol burned into the wall. This one is different than all the others that came before it, however, because the news got wind of it. Meaning the Emperor got to see the symbol for the first time, since Vader was doing his best to cover that part of the assassinations up because he knew that Palpatine knew that the symbol referenced Anakin Skywalker's exploits in the Clone Wars and Vader also knew that his master would put the pieces of the puzzle together and understand that there is another Skywalker on the loose. Vader was right when he predicted that the revelation would not go over well with the old man (although he, much like us, have doubts as to whether he is a man at all).

The news article concerning the murder of the Grand General was released with the Emperor's approval. There were late night shows concerning what this meant, news anchors were going into hysterics, and a feeling of chaos permeated the digital portion of the Empire all because of a symbol.

Λασς

It signaled the return of Skywalker, the most infamous general of the traitorous Jedi Army in the Clone Wars. He had disappeared without a trace nearly 20 years ago, occasional speculation coming around if the man was even dead, or if he was instead hiding for the perfect moment to come back and haunt the galaxy once more.

'Well, they definitely got that wrong,' thought Vader, who was previously known as Anakin Skywalker, as he stalked down a hallway in the newly minted Executor, trying to keep his troops in line. 'Anakin Skywalker is Dead. Besides they missed the first part of the symbol, which is clearly different from Anakin Skywalker's symbol anyways, but that it means that someone is taking up the mantle of Skywalker or is a child of Skywalker.'

The cyborg had ruled out the first option, given that he erased what he could of Anakin Skywalker's legacy without raising the Emperor's suspicion, since he had told Vader to not erase any of it. He definitely erased that symbol, or at least put it in the extremely restricted category, because the only people who knew that symbol fought in the Clone Wars or had access to restricted material, which means that they fought in the Clone Wars.

* * *

However, what was lost on everyone in the Empire, and even a majority of members in the Rebel Alliance, was that the leak of the symbol did the job it was supposed to do. It drew attention away from the Rebel's latest exploit and confused the Empire momentarily so that the Alliance could get a step ahead. Yes, it alerted the Emperor, and the public, that there was a Skywalker on the loose. Yes, it made Luke's job of hiding from the Empire much harder because he still used his actual last name instead of changing it to help him not be found as quickly, but he was already in danger of that anyways because of the tiny fact that he blew up the Death Star.

Leia watched the chaos, pleased with how she orchestrated the blow out. She used the ability to walk unnoticed through the Force to assassinate the Grand General- who supported slavery, murder, and rape/sexual use of girls of a different species- and used Anakin Skywalker's lightsaber to chop his head off, light his clothes on fire to burn his body, and to carve the symbol into the wall behind the man. She then lead the media to the location of the crime scene using Force suggestions. They got there just in time to get pictures before the Investigators started tearing down the crime scene to keep the symbol from the Emperor and the public. Leia, as well as Luke, suspect that the Investigators were under the orders of their biological father to keep the truth under wraps.

* * *

It was 5 days after the release of the symbol of Skywalker that Mon Mothma ordered a secret meeting between the top of the top in the Alliance, which included Leia, over the subject of Luke Skywalker himself. Leia let Luke listen to the meeting through their twin connection that Qui-Gon Jinn showed them how to use, given that he didn't interrupt the meeting physically. He would be in so much trouble if he did it anyways.

"This meeting is an anomaly, I know," Mon said as she started the meeting of maybe 20 people (Most likely less, Leia thought). "But the subject is one that we've been ignoring for some time, especially since Luke Skywalker came back from his time with the Jedi Master Yoda. There are five people in this galaxy that know the full truth of the Skywalker family at this time, and two of them are in this room."

'So Mon is planning on sharing the secret of us being twins?' Luke's thought came to her.

'No. She didn't ask me if she could do that. I thought that I told you what this meeting would be about.' Leia responded irritably (She'd had a rough week).

Mon Mothma continued, unaware of the mental conversation between the twins. "It is well known within the Alliance that Luke Skywalker is the son of Anakin Skywalker, and that Obi-Wan Kennobi told young Luke that Vader betrayed and murdered his father. What is not told is that General Kennobi visited young Skywalker in a dream a few days after the Battle of Yavin to apologize for telling him that his father was dead. Luke told Leia Organa and Han Solo what the late Jedi told him about his father, and they just recently came to me with the truth in light of the recent events"

'It really sounds like she'll give out the full truth, Leia.' Luke sounded worried.

'Why does that make you nervous, Luke?'

'Because of you, honestly. Can you stop her at all?'

His answer wasn't really an answer, but Leia understood that it meant he wasn't concerned for himself at all. However, she couldn't answer him before Mothma continued.

"Anakin Skywalker had twins and Fell into the Dark Side of the Force, becoming Darth Vader. The other twin will remain anonymous unless they wish to be known to the 15 of us"

'I was right! There are less than 20 people in this room!' Leia triumphantly exclaimed mentally.

'I guess now it's my turn to ask you to Focus Leia. Pay attention to the other people in the room.'

"This means that Luke and his twin are behind all that is going on in the galaxy at the moment. The twins of Skywalker are using his symbol to mark that they are displeased with the state of the galaxy and are disrupting the Empire with the assassinations and the seemingly random pranks."

Here Mothma paused to let the other people in the room catch up with what she was saying, and Leia knew that it was a bad idea to do so. The reason why is because even 15 people can make a lot of noise when startled or confused, which makes it harder to reign them in so they can continue on with the meeting, which is exactly was happened after Mon Mothma paused for only a second. Leia made her mind up in that second that she was going to reveal herself as the twin of Luke Skywalker, so that she could give a more detailed report to the Council about what they were planning to do. Luke agreed with her one second after she conveyed what she wanted to do and for what reason.

'The more people who know at this point, the better. They might also be able to help us do what we need to do.'

'I agree.'

Using the Force, Leia made a small bubble of air above her expand rapidly and give off the sound of a small thunder crash, silencing everyone in the room almost immediately.

"I have permission from the twin of Luke Skywalker to tell you her identity." Leia said, her voice carrying in the small conference room that the 15 of them were in.

With the room almost entirely silent, she carried on, drawing encouragement from her brother. "The twin of Skywalker is in this room with us today, and it has been she who has been carrying out the assassinations while her brother takes care of the pranks." Ignoring the faces of 13, she faced Mon Mothma and spoke to her, knowing that she already knew. "I am the twin of Luke Skywalker, daughter of Anakin Skywalker, now Darth Vader. And I tell you this today to ask for your help to bring down the Empire that has broken my family."

Unlike the last time there was a pause, the room stayed silent, an echo of how Mon Mothma herself responded when the twins told her the truth so that they could go see Yoda together. Mothma was smiling this time, and Leia took comfort in the fact that she, at least, wouldn't question her loyalty to the Rebellion.

Luke knew something that Leia didn't, which is rare. Luke knew that no one in the room questioned her loyalty because of her last sentence. She wasn't asking for justice. She was asking for personal retribution, and no one who wants personal retribution would help the side they want destroyed in anyway, shape, or form. Anyone who does doesn't actually want retribution. But Leia has the fire so common to many in her eyes as she asks for assistance that no one could doubt her. It's why she's the People's Princess, not just the Princess of the Dead World.


	6. It's Time To Go To Yoda

Hey y'all. Sorry about the wait. It's been a hectic summer. This also took longer because I got good advice on editing that I wanted to try - and it works. I rewrote this chapter after I had already written it, and since I don't have a beta, I figured this is the closest I would get to actually get to actually editing my story. I liked the end result, let me know if you did as well.

Dislaimers:

1) Do not own Star Wars

2)I am doing this for my own enjoyment and for practice. It will probably (definitely) not be in any clear order, although I will try to make it clear when this is taking place.

If you have requests or ideas for pranks, please let me know.

* * *

.5 ABY

* * *

Obi-Wan Kenobi and Qui-Gon Jinn watched now sleeping Luke and Leia, the twins that showed that they were the children of two of the best strategists of the Clone Wars. The young adults had been reviewing materials and plans for an Alliance Operation that would end up being crucial while creating a code that only a few people in the galaxy would ever know. Both of them tried hard to fight against the power that tugs at all mortals, but ended up failing as they fell asleep in what Obi-Wan thought were extremely uncomfortable positions. Luke was seated in a metal chair and his torso lying over the table, with tablets under him in various positions. Leia had leaned back in her more comfortable chair with her head tilted to the left and a little bit of drool on her chin.

"I think the continuous late nights have finally caught up to them." Qui-Gon remarked.

Obi-Wan shot his former master a glare even as he kept silent (Qui-Gon never took sarcasm well, even though he seemed to dish enough of it out. Although, Obi-Wan ended up questioning how much was sarcasm quite a bit of the time), and silently thanked the Force for the idea to keep the twins apart for the first 20 years or so of their life. The Empire had a much harder time finding out about them and they would have caused SO much trouble that even if they weren't force sensitive, the Empire would have come knocking anyways. It's been only 6 months since he told the twins the truth, and already the majority of the Rebellion was running around in pink for their droids that would keep insisting that they didn't have to work for them. Slavers are also finding it hard to do their 'work', and Jabba may or may not (depending on the rumors; Obi-Wan has no desire to see if any of them are true) be trying to leave Tatooine. And these kids had the most rudimentary training in the force!

Obi-Wan, even though he is dead, is oblivious to the fact that it is his fault that all this is happening (hey, ghosts aren't omniscient). He never figured out that Anakin did some 'work' on R2D2 that allowed him to keep his memories and be Extra Sneaky. And he left this droid with Luke and Leia, son and daughter of the biggest pranksters of the galaxy (Padme was always a Skywalker at heart, she just had to realize it). That droid has 'reprogrammed' many droids in the same fashion that Anakin reprogrammed it, and has gotten pink paint in places where Luke could not reach, and has gotten rid of (disposed of, assassinated, offed) people that Leia couldn't because she couldn't blend in enough. Most of these are low level assistants and soldiers, but it causes enough confusion that it allows the Alliance to at least feed itself and keep running long enough for them to come up with a suitable plan of attack

"I think it's time they met Master Yoda," Qui-Gon startled Obi-Wan out of his thoughts (and ruined the author's attempt at giving some back ground that she thought was necessary to the story).

"Why? They'll cause more havoc than they already do."

His biggest fear, of course, is that they turn into mini-Anakin's (figuratively and literally): balls of emotion, pranks, strategy, and supernatural abilities.

"Yes, but they do need to learn about the Force, and we've seen in the past 4 months that they need a teacher that is alive before they continue lessons with us. They have an incredibly hard time learning anything with us now that we are dead, but Luke had a relatively easy time with you when you were alive."

Obi-Wan threw his head back and sighed Very Loudly, because Qui-Gon was right. He heard the underlying fact that they needed to protect themselves, and that they weren't learning how to do that with them. He looked back down at the sleeping children and grimaced. Why did it always have to be the youth who ended up in the thick of it all? Naboo, the Clone Wars, and the Rebellion all seemed to be fought by the youth who would be scared forever and never heal from the horrors they would end up seeing. Fine. If continuing their education in the ways of the Force would allow these young people to avoid the worst of war (which he doubted), keep them alive, and keep others alive as well, he would do what was necessary.

"Very well. I will tell them of Master Yoda's location tomorrow night, if Luke will talk to me."

"Go to Leia if you don't think that Luke will receive your message. She is generally more logical than he is."

(The reader should know that Qui-Gon wasn't in the room when it was Leia who suggested a galaxy wide prank war once Luke told her what Obi-Wan told him. Leia is also the one who takes the most outlandish ideas and makes it so that they could be possible to pull off in the future - like turning the Emperor's wardrobe pink and purple or telling Vader the truth and converting him back to the Light. What better way to get revenge than to take the Emperor's right hand man out from under his nose?)(The reader should also note that Leia would make a terrifying villain.)

"That sounds like a good idea. She doesn't think that I lied to her about her parentage, and should be more open to what I have to say."

"Are you saying that you didn't lie to Luke, former apprentice?" Qui-Gon looked at the other man sternly, but he did not see it.

"From a certain point of view, I didn't."

"But it also means that from a certain point of view, you did lie to him."

"Qui-Gon," Obi-Wan sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Stop this already. I didn't lie to him."

Obi-Wan left his former master with the twins as they were beginning to wake up.

"You know I'm right, Obi-Wan," the dead Jedi said to himself as he watched the twins reorient themselves and their things. "You just don't want to admit it."

Now that he was alone with the kids, he took the time to look at something that he'd seen a while ago that peaked his interest. It was a plan that required stealth to pull off, but it looked like the bare bones of a plan to corner a commander of some type in a place that was renowned for it's lack of surveillance. In the small print, it looked like Luke needed to learn more about fighting with a lightsaber to pull it off, and both of the twins being able to walk around undetected. Qui-Gon smiled. He, unlike Obi-Wan, liked what the twins had been doing so far. If he could help them cause a little more chaos for the Empire, and galaxy at large, he would do whatever a dead Jedi in his position could do.

* * *

See what I did there? :D


	7. What in Tarnation?

Hey! I now have time to actually get things done! Huzzah! Anyways, thank you for the reviews that have given me some pretty good ideas.

1)I do not own Star Wars. Just having fun

2)I AM just having fun. Not fully sure how much continuity this story will actually have.

3)If you have any ideas, please leave a review and tell me. I really enjoy writing this stuff, but I have a bit of a serious nature, and appreciate help.

* * *

.5 ABY (a week or so after Chapter 6)

"What in Tarnation?!"

Han's exclamation rang across the hanger and pilots, mechanics, and anyone else who was there looked to see what the problem was. What they saw was a now pink Falcon and a pissed former smuggler. Most people went back to their work without a second thought; more and more things were becoming pink now a days. A few people laughed, and some of those were people who knew the former smuggler well. Most just really enjoyed the visual. Mon Mothma, who happened to be in the hanger (due to a tip off by our resident pranksters), laughed for a different reason. She knew who the pranksters were.

The leader of the Rebellion thought about going over to Mr. Solo and telling him that the paint wasn't going to come off no matter how hard he tried, but she did promise that a video of his reaction would be available to the twins when they returned.

While she was on the topic of the Skywalker twins, she mulled over the news they brought her a week ago, using it as explanation as to why both of them wanted a few months off from the Rebellion. It was still shocking. Vader was once Anakin Skywalker, Luke and Leia were twins, both could use the Force, Yoda was still alive, and that they were responsible for the droid 'revolution' and the pink that could be seen anywhere in any of the Rebel bases. All in a span of 6 months. The twins left to train with Yoda last night, apparently after they finished painting the Falcon for Han. And to think that she thought they had left because they didn't want to make a big deal of it. Skywalkers.

Mon Mothma's comm beeped from a message from Madine about the Intel that came from a deep cover spy last night. Sighing, she left the pink Falcon and an angry Han behind and turned her mind to pleasanter things. Like the bet that was going around the Rebellion right now about whether or not Luke and Leia would be an official couple.

'_It__'s a good thing I don't usually bet on things, or otherwise I'd loose a lot of money_,' She thought. '_Although__… Han might be able to finally pay back Jabba when it comes out that they are twins_.' Maybe all this betting would be a good thing after all, because then Han and Leia could get together. She'd see the glances shared between the two of them. Maybe she should start a separate betting pool on that possibility. Under a different name, of course; she can't let anyone know she's been betting again.

Later that evening when she made a copy of the fallout of the prank for the twins, she laughed once more about the fact that they had everyone fooled into thinking that they could be a couple. Skywalkers and their pranks. They never end.

* * *

A small ship landed (crashed) into a swamp, and two disgruntled humans climbed out, arguing with each other like siblings usually do when something goes wrong.

"I told you it wouldn't work!"

"Oh, like you would have done it better than me?!"

"_Actually_, I would have!"

"Actually _**Nothing**_! The sensors went blank and neither of us are in tuned with the Force enough-"

"So _That__'s_ what matters! Being able to _feel_ your way around! **Well**, let me tell you-"

(You get the idea. They're siblings **And** Skywalkers.)

Yoda was standing not too far off from the crash because he knew they were coming, and upon seeing the arguing twins, started muttering to himself about bad ideas, thick skulls, and something about being too old. Obi-Wan agreed with whatever the old master said, while Qui-Gon disagreed on a fundamental basis. No one is too old to learn anything. Also, the jovial mindset of the twins made him think that, once again, they were trying to pull one over on the Jedi Master.

'_I wish ghosts could eat, because right now, I'd have a bag of popcorn ready to chow down on_,' he thought to himself.

Yoda finally spoke up, interrupting the 'squabble'. "Skywalkers welcome you are. Stop arguing you should. Older than that you are." Disappointment rolled of the Jedi, even as the twins started giggling, completely disregarding the argument they were in only 5 seconds ago. Qui-Gon wondered if they'd done this before.

"We are terribly sorry…"

"Master Yoda. You see…"

"We get along so well…"

"And we are so ready to become real Jedi…"

"**We just couldn****'t contain our enthusiasm**," the twins finished at the same time with identical broad smiles.

Yoda's disappointment grew in the face of their childish antics, and Obi-Wan felt like he should have seen this coming. Qui-Gon simply chortled and seriously wished for popcorn (me too, dude).

"Come with me you must if want to become Jedi you still do."

The old master began to walk (hobble) away, and the twins followed him, their good mood kinda dampened by his refusal to react or have fun. Obi-Wan turned to Qui-Gon with a frown marring his face, not dampening the ghost's good mood one bit.

"I was right to not introduce the twins to you. Part of me wonders if you are a Skywalker in disguise."

"Peace, Kenobi. If I was a Skywalker, I would not hide it. I simply enjoy the children's antics."

Obi-Wan turned away from him and scowled at something alive instead of him, and continued to be unable to do anything about the slightly ridiculous youths.

'If I was able to grow up with my family, like these kids, I might have known if I have Skywalker blood or not through family stories. I'm glad that Kenobi and Yoda allowed these twins to have families, even though their childhoods were spent apart from each other. They had love, nurture, and support that all children need. It's why the Order failed.' Qui-Gon mussed bitterly as he followed behind the unlikely trio, not showing himself to them.

Yoda sat the twins down and started walking them through the details of meditating in the Force, one of the things a youngling should learn how to do with the Force. They had heard this all before from Obi-Wan, but soaked it up anyways. When Yoda led them through the guided meditation they tried so many times in the dreams, they didn't stall or grasp for something that wasn't there. They more than touched the Force; they jumped into it feet first, leaving Yoda behind. Something happened after a few seconds though, and they were suddenly slammed back into reality.

"Feared this would happen I did," Yoda said when the twins gained their bearings once more.

The twins were now paying Yoda the type of attention they'd never given Obi-Wan

"Why is that?" asks Luke.

"Twins you are and the strongest Jedi in history your father is. A powerful bond the you two have."

Yoda takes a breath, and Qui-Gon can see the struggle the old Master was having between leaving it at that or delving in deeper in to the mechanics of bonds and confusing them.

Yoda shouldn't have worried about it, however, because Leia spoke up before he could make up his mind. "So our bond basically combines our power and makes it easier to touch the Force together, but only if we work together?"

Yoda nodded in agreement and clarified the effects. "When using with the Force together work against each other you cannot. On your own you become."

"I figured," Luke interjected looking from Yoda to Leia and back again. "Once I had a thought of exploring by myself, doing it on my own, we lost our hold on the Force and… well, crashed back into reality."

Yoda nodded once again, and said, "Train you separately I must. Be able to do everything on your own you must. Use your bond as a crutch you cannot. Know why you do."

Both twins agreed with this, solemnly understanding the nature of war. However, this understanding didn't stop the grins from spreading on both of their faces when they realized that if they worked together, they would be near unstoppable. They would be able to pull off the craziest of their plans after getting out of this swamp. The first plans they would put into action would be Plan 'Befuddle the Empire' and Plan 'Vendetta'. There might actually be a chance that the Rebellion would win the war.

* * *

The Emperor and Vader stood in the Emperor's throne room looking out over Coruscant contemplating different things. Vader was planning ways to capture and stop the Rebellion, although it was becoming significantly harder, since competent men kept disappearing. The Emperor was thinking about the disturbance in the Force 6 months ago. Everything had settled back into normality, except a tiny, dim blip of light that hadn't been there before. He wanted it extinguished, but the question was how to do so. Both men were taken off guard when the Force trembled and bursting into a blinding light for only a moment before going back to the way it was before. But Palpatine noticed that the speck of light was bigger and brighter than it was before, and he did not like it.

Vader noticed something different than his Master though. He had seen a face, a face that matched a picture given to him only a few days ago. A spy had been able to get a picture of the pilot that destroyed the Death Star 7 months ago. Although the picture was blurry, he could still see the face structure of the boy, his blond hair, and his blue eyes. This face was clearer and was filled with wonder. Was this the boy's first time touching the Force like that? He'd felt his presence on the Death Star and while they were in the trench, so he was sure that it was the same boy, but surely he had a teacher! No matter. He started changing his plans of destroying the Rebellion to include capturing this pilot. Maybe he would help in overthrowing the Emperor…


	8. Real Men Wear Pink

Hey y'all! I had this idea from someone who left a comment on this story. Thank you person who did that! This chapter made me laugh while writing, and I hope it makes y'all laugh as well.

1) I do not own Star Wars

2)I am doing this for my own enjoyment and it will not be in any particular order even though I do have a tentative plan.

3)Please comment if you have a prank idea or just want to give me advice for this story. Constructive criticism is a good thing.

* * *

1 ABY (1 month after the pranking of the Emperor)

* * *

Mon Mothma stood before the various commanders and leaders of the Rebel Alliance for an unplanned meeting with an uncharacteristic grin on her face. Many noted that the last time she had this look was when the Emperor and Vader were, for lack of a better word (there is no better word), pranked. This time is not different at all.

"I'm sure all of you are wondering why we are meeting today."

She observed nods from most everybody, except Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa (Mon was keeping a close eye on these two. She knew they were behind the pranks, but they'd gotten more secretive after they came back from Jedi training 3 months ago. They had something big planned, and this was just the beginning. She was almost never wrong). Luke and Leia simply smiled at her in a way that gave her a feeling of trepidation, but couldn't pinpoint why.

"We are here today to cover the newest… prank… that was committed against the Empire a day ago. Someone, or someones (she looked at Luke and Leia), spray-painted the words "REAL MEN WEAR PINK" onto the walls of Palpatine's palace, in obvious reference to the… wardrobe malfunction that happened a month ago."

The room filled with chuckles remembering the legendary video that still circulated through the Rebellion and even made appearances on the black market. Mon's smile got wider as she remembered it as well, but reminiscing on the wonders a pink robe does to one's complexion was not the purpose of the meeting today.

"I come before with an idea. We take the slogan that the Empire is trying to hide, and we run with it."

Wedge Antilles spoke right after she finished, glee shining through his eyes. "So you mean we can finally make our uniforms and flight suits pink?"

"Yes it does." Clearly the man and his team had been waiting for this for a long time, as the leaders of the various squads whooped and pumped fists into the air.

"If it makes the Empire squirm, I'm all for it. However, what are the ramifications of this proposition? Some of the uniforms we wear need to blend in, as well as equipment. In certain areas, it is not wise to wear pink." General Madine voiced thoughts that several others seemed to be thinking as well, wanting to do it, but worried at giving themselves away.

"What if we all wear pink armbands instead? It's easier than painting everything pink, and it can be concealed, but we'd still be 'Real Men'." Luke Skywalker threw his idea out there, almost like he planned this (and even though he's painted most Rebel equipment pink by now).

'If Luke wants to cause chaos, as I suspect he's been doing for sometime, then it's time to cause some well meant chaos. Skywalkers are usually right when it comes to inserting chaos into a situation.' Mon thought to herself while out loud she said, "Brilliant idea. Does any of the rest of the council either object or have something else to add?"

Nobody spoke, but many had smiles on their faces that spoke of the glee that comes from getting back at the Empire. Luke and Leia looked satisfied and happy with the result. Mon had a feeling that the already pink Rebellion was about to get a lot pinker soon, and she was generally right.

* * *

The Empire tried to cover it up. They really did (bless their hearts). But they really underestimated their opponents in this one-sided prank war. Their opponents in this prank war had taken pictures of the done deed and somehow used the Force to make sure that the paint could never come off (but don't ask them how. They'll claim that they don't know how they did it since they don't even know what the Force means and then change the subject really fast. How do I know this? Well, that's a story for a different day). On an outside wall of the Emperor's palace is a message in large, hot pink letters: REAL MEN WEAR PINK! Nobody is quite sure how it got there, or if they do know, then they aren't telling and are content to watch the Empire try to throw hands at somebody they could never hope to catch. Since they still cannot get the offensive words off, workers decided to cover them with a big sheet, with the excuse that the area is undergoing renovation now, and that they are so sorry for the inconvenience.

'The Skywalker genes really are strong with him,' a person who will go unnamed for this mental dialog says to himself when he's finally alone. 'However, his mother's genes are all too present in him.' He'd finally figured out that the assassin and the prankster were one and the same (definitely on accident, the twins didn't mean to leak that to him At All, why would you suggest such a thing? How dare-!) about 2 weeks after the prank on the Emperor, causing the sill unnamed person to actually laugh out loud and tell the Emperor that the culprit must be as good as Anakin Skywalker, because the Empire cannot seem to catch him. At this point, the Emperor still gets furious at any mention of the Incident-That-Will-Not-Be-Named, as any self-respecting Evil Overlord does when all their dark, ominous clothes get painted pink. Anyways, the person still had enough preservation instinct that he did not want to be close to the Emperor anytime soon, because his legendary anger is bound to strike him at the fact that this happened and he still hadn't caught the culprit.

The unnamed person shuddered at the thought of facing Palpatine's wrath and decided that it was time to take a long vacation to the Outer Rim to tr and find those damned Rebels, who have become harder to find because of Skywalker pulling pranks and offing his actually good officers and the Rebellion taking advantage of the confusion to target places that stored supplies, thus refilling their own and depleting the Empire's.

The person started to wonder if it all was done on purpose, so that the Empire would be easier to take down, but ended up dismissing the idea. No Skywalker actually thinks that far in advance.

* * *

Yoda sat upon his log, meditating and listening to the Force. When he came out of his trance, the old Jedi Master grimaced and let his thoughts wander over to the twins of Skywalker. It'd been 2 or 3 months since they'd left his care, and already they were in a position to take down the main ruling force of the galaxy. He figured that Luke was doing this just for fun, because that's how the boy is, but Leia… Leia definitely knows what she is doing. She was more her mother than her father, and it was well known by those who were close to the lady that she would have been able to take over the galaxy and that nobody would know until it was too late. Leia might use pranks like her father, but the intention could have only come from her mother. The old Jedi had vowed 20 years ago to watch from the side line in Dagobah and not get involved, but now he was wishing he hadn't. Yoda would have liked to visit a few places one last time before they were burned to the ground with the rest of the galaxy.


	9. Did You Hear

I am now finally getting into the plot. It was, at first, some stupid pranks, but now I hope that things will begin to come together. Sorry it took me so long to update. I've been settling into college, and this was a convenient thing to procrastinate and forget about my stress with for a little while. I hope that I can update soon. Thank you so much for reading and being patient with me. Please review and tell me any mistakes I made, if I got something wrong, or if you have any ideas for pranks that the Skywalkers can pull together.

I also want to note that I mention things from the time before the Empire was created. I am not following the Clone Wars at all, so I don't want any confusion there. A Final Plot that is mentioned later on is a plot to discover the Sith Lord, and obviously it went wrong. That is all that you need to know about that.

* * *

1.5 ABY

* * *

The Imperial spy, whose name will go unsaid, sat back and listened to the talk of the bar that many Rebels visited when they were not working. He was listening for rumors that were going around about the Empire so that he could know how to respond to these things in real life if they ever came up. Some of the ones he hears are spoken ironically and laughed at, but some are believed. One of the ones that people laugh at is that Vader and Palpatine hold an underground karaoke club and dance to stay in shape. The real reason he is here tonight is that he had heard a whisper of a rumor that Vader had a child who was in the Rebellion. It was absurd, and yet it kinda made sense if one looks at how Vader had been treating the Rebellion lately.

"Hey dude, got a weird rumor for ya!"

The spy started listening more to this conversation that was happening behind him.

"What is it this time? You know I'm not into that kind of stuff."

"Yeah, but this one is Weird to the max, bro! I heard someone say that Vader and Palpatine are homosexual and in a relationship with one another. It would explain why Vader doesn't have an official rank in the military and why Vader's armor appeared in Palpatine's closet during that one video."

The men chuckled at the fond memory while the spy went still. They had cameras in the Palace?

"If that were true, I would feel somewhat sorry for Vader. No one deserves to put up with that wrinkled prune."

"Some say the prune is not a man at all, which is what makes that rumor even weirder."

The spy decided that his life was not worth listening to the rest of the conversation, and got up to leave, but even his dedication could not keep out the words that followed as he tried to leave.

"Some say that Palpatine is a demon straight from hell."

When the spy stumbles in his room, dizzy from too much alcohol and strange tales, he collapses on his bed and hopes that in the morning he will remember everything that happened, because it will be quite the story to tell his handler.

(Naturally, the spy tells more people than just his handler. Luke and Leia are super glad that their plan worked so well.)

* * *

15 days later (the twins have been busy)

"Why am I hearing rumors that Vader is not actually a machine OR a human, but rather 3 Ewoks stacked on top of each other, and that Vader and Palpatine's love child is in the Rebellion?

The Skywalker twins looked at everything that wasn't Mothma as they stumbled over themselves to tell her that it was a prank and not anything to be taken seriously. In that moment, the leader of the Rebellion longed to put her head in her hands or scream from frustration (or both), but she reminds herself that she's dealt with weirder things. She was in the Senate with Padme Amidala, after all.

"Just leave my office and close the door on your way out. You both know that this is unacceptable behavior. Do not go about spreading rumors like this ever again."

Luke Skywalker and Leia Skywalker Organa leave, still not looking at her, but also not looking sorry at the chaos they created. One the door closed, the lady pulled out a bottle of gin that she kept for special occasions, hoping that a drink will giver her the strength she needs to get through this whole debacle. Silently, she thanked the forces that were that no one else would see that the Skywalkers were driving her to drink. Again.

* * *

10 days later

"When I told you both to stop spreading rumors, I expected to be taken seriously. I did not want to hear that Vader cross-dresses to… _please_ Palpatine." Lady Mon Mothma takes a fortifying breath as she wipes that image from her mind. Yesterday had been a brutal one. "What are you planning that involves telling rumors of Vader? You two are targeting him, and I believe that the reason goes far beyond having fun or simply pranking the Empire, because I have never heard of Vader being more mad than he is now."

Luke and Leia look at each other for a few seconds, but when both look back at Mothma, there is a seriousness that she hadn't seen in a Skywalker since The Final Plot, the one that lead to the creation of Vader and the death of her friend.

Leia breaks the now tense silence, and says, "We want to draw Vader to a place determined by us, so that Luke can surprise him by already knowing the truth. Luke needs to talk to Vader to see if he can be turned away from the Dark Side. This war cannot be won without him either dead or with us, and we cannot kill our father."

"We've been using the rumors to make this personal. That way Vader goes to defend his honor and Palpatine does not get mad at him disappearing for a while to find the perpetrator. If we do this right, we hope that he will join us in taking down the Emperor."

As Luke finishes, Mon Mothma stares at the two in a kind of silent horror as she realized just how right they are and how much thought they put into this. In her memory, not even Anakin has pulled off a plan that incorporated as much genius as stupidity, although he came close one time.

"And you think this will work?" Incredulity stains her voice as she asks the question.

The twins look at each other before Luke answers.

"The first part already has. But this is our only chance to test the waters with him." He looks at Mothma again. "We cannot let him stay in the Empire, and that is the only thing we know for certain right now."

* * *

Yoda was waiting for Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan to come back with news of what the twins were doing, and while he was waiting, he called up spirits from long ago to keep him company so that he would not fret about the impending report. Any Skywalker worth their salt would be able to overthrow a single world in a week, a star system in two, and a quadrant in 4, so it is fair to say that Yoda despaired for the state of the galaxy. (What Yoda doesn't know, although he will soon, is that tearing apart the galaxy is not their plan right now. If it was, they would be behind schedule.)

When Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon reappear on Dagobah, Yoda and the ghosts who are with him know that the twins were up to something worse than simply overturning the Empire. The way they could tell is that Kenobi has not been this hysterical, or Qui-Gon this serious, while they were living or dead.

Qui-Gon Jinn takes a breath and starts talking.

"You all have heard of the Skywalker twins' great pranks against the Empire, correct?"

The others nodded or murmured their consent while a couple of Jedi go to try and calm Obi-Wan down (which, at this point, is a fruitless task, as he's been on the edge of hysteria for quite some time).

"Turns out they are building up to something bigger than simply taking over the Empire and creating chaos, and they are almost ready to put this bigger plan into motion." Qui-Gon pauses here, trying to figure out what he will say next, because the truth is ridiculous even to him. If he hadn't been in the room when they explained it to Mon Mothma, he wouldn't have believed it.

"The twins are trying to lure their father into a meeting where they will tell him the truth and hopefully bring him back to the Light, something no one has ever gotten a Sith to do."

Silence reigned for a good solid minute (excluding Obi-Wan continuing to freak out) as everyone there tried to process what they had been told, and it is only broken by Yoda asking a question.

"Send them to me for training, why did you? Stop them now, we cannot, from this plan of theirs."


	10. The Plot Thickens

2 ABY

Leia watches her brother land the small ship she made him take for this mission, since his X-wing would have drawn too much attention where she needed him to go to further their overall mission. After Luke shuts down the ship and exits, she raises an eyebrow (did you succeed?), knowing that it communicates the question she cannot ask out loud (because of other people) or through their bond (because Luke is exhausted). He nods in answer (he succeeded), and is then bombarded by fellow pilots, friends, and other Rebels as they all try to make sure that he is okay and if he really had a run-in with Imperials. Leia leaves him to it, knowing that she'll get her time with Luke later to ask him how he did and to possibly tell him about a new development that rose while he was gone.

It was hours later when the Council finally let Luke leave their presence. The mission they had originally given him should have only taken two weeks, at most, but since he had been gone for a month and a half without any communication (that's what they think, at least), they needed some serious convincing that Luke was alright and not traumatized at the hand of the Empire. He is finally able to leave when Mothma tells them that he had been on a private mission for her. She then pulls him over and tells him that he owes her a nice bottle of whiskey since she drank most of her liquor storage because of her stress over him, but that is neither here nor there, as the next thing she tells him that he owes her are the results of the other mission that he went on.

Luke sighed as he entered the planning room they had on the Falcon, and flopped into his chair, still in the clothes he'd been in for the past week.

"Gross. Go get cleaned up and changed before you fall asleep and make this place stink worse than it already does."

"Jus' give me a minute…" Luke says as he leans his head back.

It was more than a minute later when Leia shakes Luke awake and drags him into the small bathroom on board the Falcon. 20 minutes later, a cleaner Luke steps out and proceeds to flop back into to chair he'd been in earlier. It really was a good thing they were on the Falcon instead of another place on base, Leia tells herself, because she wasn't sure that Luke would have found the planning room again if the distance between it and the wash room was to great, considering how tired he is (even if the downside is that Han bothers them and interrupts their planning time and flirts with her every chance he gets).

"Do you need sleep before you tell this story, or can you tell it to me now?" Leia asks.

"I think I can tell it to you," Luke replies as he straightens up in his chair. "Just be patient with me, alright?"

"Alright."

Luke's story leaves Leia both breathless from laughter and from worry. Yes, it all went according to plan, but the plan was harebrained at best, and Leia was sure that Luke had a 40% chance of failure. Threepio didn't even need to tell her the odds for her to know that.

"I do need to tell you about some developments on my end, but that can wait until you've gotten some sleep."

"No, tell me. I've told you everything, and I can use the Force to keep myself awake for at least another hour," Luke brushes off his very apparent exhaustion with the typical Skywalker stubbornness. "That, and I fear that we will soon get so busy that you won't have time for you to tell me about these developments, and I do not wish to be blindsided."

Leia was not satisfied with that answer, but she had that same feeling, and so she decided to humor her brother.

"Fine. Well, an Imperial defector was found by an important member of the Navy, but instead of being killed for treason or interrogated, was told that a more important member of the Navy wished to defect because of Alderaan. I have since gotten in touch with the person, who wishes to remain anonymous to all but me at the moment, and the only reason I allowed him this is the fact that the Force told me we would need him and that he was telling the truth. He can get the letter to Vader without the cyborg realizing it was him, for one thing, and he can tell us if Vader follows up on the letter."

Luke stares at her with wide eyes for a moment, and then his eyes get (somehow) wider as he comes to a realization.

"I think I know who it is! He might be the only reason I wasn't caught red-handed on either of my missions."

"Who kept you from getting caught, kid?"

Han Solo was standing in the doorway, making the two rebel twins jump as they had not been paying attention.

"The Force, Han. Naturally," Luke barely got out, finally letting his exhaustion creep in.

He stumbled out of the room after saying good night, leaving Leia and Han alone (as was his intent, but don't tell Leia that). They both watch him go, and then Han invites himself into the room that is filled with random scribbles (the twins' 'secret language') and sits on the table as Leia attempts to put the more important things away.

"Did Luke's mission go well?"

Leia smiled, hearing the concern in Han's voice, and began to tell him a little bit of what happened.

"It did. He completed the original mission without a problem, but during the prank mission, he almost got caught. It was planned, because we want Vader to know something is going on, but it could have gone very wrong. He tampered with Vader's main Tie Fighter to play an annoying song whenever it boots up and for it's guns to not fire correctly. I can't tell you everything, but this should help move our overall plan forward as well as throw Vader off our trails for a little bit."

"Because Vader would expect that Luke would go back to the Alliance after the original mission instead of following him onto the Executor, right?"

"That is correct."

The two sat in silence for a minute or so, each thinking of very different things but enjoying the silence all the same, until Han finally decides to ask a question that has been bothering him for quite some time.

"Why did you decide to help Luke prank the galaxy? I know there's something the two of you aren't telling me, and while I haven't pried until today, it seems like the two of you could use some further help. That, and you never struck me as the type to prank people."

Leia stood, having finished putting away what she could, and skillfully evaded the question. "I was the one Luke told first, and it seemed like a good idea at the time, because it helped Luke come to terms with what he learned and it did damage to the Empire at the same time."

"Your Worship, both of us know how to answer a question with a half truth and how to tell when others do the same," Han rebutted, smirking at her. "I'm sure your answer is correct, but it ain't the full truth. I personally think it has to do with the rumors of you and Luke being a couple that you do nothing but flame since I can tell there is no attraction like that between the two of you."

_Why is this man so perceptive?_ Leia wonders as she listens to him pick their plan apart. She sighs, and knows that she cannot evade what he's trying to get at anymore, and that is her true relationship with Luke. He may act dumb sometimes, but he was one of the smartest men she knew. There was a reason he succeeded so long at smuggling.

"Luke is my twin brother."

Han smirks, like he knew beforehand, but then his expression changes as his eyes widen and his jaw drops.

"So you two are targeting Vader to get back at him for what he did to you and to bring your family back together, as well as take the Emperor's right hand man away from him. That's what this is, isn't it!"

Leia finally lets out a quiet, but heartfelt "Damn".

She drops back into the chair she just stood up from, and lets her exhaustion overwhelm her for a little, as she asks, "Is there anything else you'd like to know, now that you understand the actual truth?"

"Yes, actually," Han says in a quieter voice than usual. It seems gentle, almost. "Are you and the kid fueling the betting pools to keep Vader and his spies from finding out about your relationship?"

"No, although it is an added perk. That was mostly for our own amusement."

Han looks thoughtful as he says offhandedly (or so Leia thought), "If I get in on the betting now, I could make some real dough when the truth comes out. No one would believe me if I said that you two are twins, as not many know that you guys share a birthday."

So he didn't respond how she thought he would, but nothing about this entire situation is going according to how any of them thought it was ever going to, so she isn't as surprised as she might have been in another life.

1) I do not own Star Wars

2) Thanks for the great ideas! Y'all will get to see Vader's reaction next chapter, I promise, but Han and Leia needed some screen time. Wouldn't be a Star Wars fanfic without that pair popping up.

3) I'm sorry for not writing this sooner. My excuses are thus: College, loosing my flash drive, loosing my motivation, dealing with mental battles, and the holidays.

4) If any of y'all have any ideas, please send them my way. They've turned out great so far, and have been fun for me to write, even if I haven't gone into to much detail.


	11. The Plot Thickens II

One week later

The Admiral of the Executor, Firmus Piett, stood on the bridge of his ship nervously waiting for Lord Vader to find what he had left on his desk without him knowing. If Lord Vader did ever find out the culprit was him, he'd loose his job and life faster than Admiral Ozzel lost his life and job. Of course, Lord Vader already knew that a commanding officer (Piett) had something to do with Skywalker's escape a week ago, coincidentally around the same time Lord Vader's TIE fighter started playing "It's A Small Universe After All" on repeat once it powers up. ( Firmus Piett had an feeling that Skywalker had something to do with it, but also knew that he could not even think about it around Vader because then he would know and that would be… bad.)

The doors to the bridge opened and heavy, ominous breathing filled the air. Piett turned to face the approaching figure, saluting and wiping his mind of what he had been thinking of (it was the only reason he was still alive). Vader's rage and determination at… something (Piett knew _exactly_ what the something was) filled the bridge and stifled the air as if it was a solid as he stalked towards the Admiral, who's only coherent thought was 'Oh no oh no oh no oh no'.

"Admiral," Vader nearly growled. "I need security scans to be run on the area around my quarters. Scan for those who can in and out of the area and if there are any weaknesses one could exploit. There is a Rebel on the ship and know how to enter the most secure room on the ship. Find the impostor and report them to me immediately."

At this, Lord Vader turns and stalks right back out, not even waiting for Admiral Piett's response.

The Admiral did not breath a sigh of relief as he ordered people around to fulfill Vader's order, specifically the handful of people who he knew would keep his secret. The evidence would have to be covered up even further and then manufactured to make it look like someone other than him, and those particular crew members would not suffer from this. But this is war, and sacrifices must be made, but they must not be made in vain. Alderaan could not be in vain.

A thought hit him, and Firmus allowed himself a tiny smile as he wondered how Vader would react to being told Luke Skywalker put the message in his room (not like it was true, but Vader didn't need to know that). Of course, he would have no proof, but Skywalker's pulled crazier stunts in the past.

The man formerly known as Anakin Skywalker, currently known as Vader, sat in his chamber and contemplated the letter he received through a worrying, and unresolved, system. The sheet of paper laid on his clean, black desk, bearing words that have haunted him for 2 days, holding a message that gave him both hope and fear. It read thus:

"Hope you liked the new surprise. I know it had us TIEd up in fits of laughter, especially after all the rumors we so graciously spread about you. We have a deal we think you'll find agreeable. You'll be able to come meet L Skywalker on Tatooine at the Lars farm in 2 weeks at dusk and stop the pranks against your person. They will continue if you do not show up. Your choice.

Sincerely,

The Pranksters"

Obviously, they knew how to reach both him and his son, that he knew the Lars (which means they knew who he had been), that Luke Skywalker and he were related, how to remain completely anonymous with an extraordinary skill, and that they knew how to use the force, but not like how the Jedi used to use it. Their methods were too unorthodox.

The cyborg had two choices before him that he had to ponder carefully. On one hand, he loved hated the relentless pranks that has pushed everyone's sanity near the edge. It started with the color pink appearing in places it shouldn't, resulting in deaths of corrupt officers and at least two droid insignias have been found in places where, like the hot pink, it shouldn't be able to appear (like his armor. How that happened, he still has no idea). Finally, the personal pranks against Darth Vader himself that have singled him out for ridicule and driving him insane so that he would have no choice but to go meet them. Could he really risk going since it, logically, had the potential to be a greater risk than the pranks themselves?

And yet… this was an offer for him to basically meet his son outside of a battle. He could finally see his son face to face… or mask, as it may be.

But what do the pranksters want from Vader? This cannot be done by their goodwill (he can't ignore the word 'we' that appeared). Vader hated that he felt blind going into this, and the Force was not offering any help to clear the situation up. He would be walking in without facts or motives or any idea of what they would want from him. He already serves one tyrannical master; he does not want to serve (and then get rid of) another one.

But to see his son… it is tempting. Vader decided to meditate on the subject further to try and gain more clarity before he made a decision.

Unknown to him, Qui-Gon Jinn watched as he slipped into the Force and helped guide him to the light, knowing that would be the only place he would get the answers he was seeking. He would help these twins reunite their family despite the ruling of Yoda, because he cared about the kids and he was already dead? What could the Jedi do? Kill him? Block him out of their meetings? Like he cared. Watching Palpatine suffer from the pranks the twins played on him was way more entertaining anyways.

Piett was finally relaxing in a small, little used lounge with a cup of water, reflecting on the past week. From him helping save Luke twice from Vader's grasp, to Vader nearly finding out just how much he helped the kid, to Vader's TIE fighter being pranked, to the letter his contact asked that he deliver to Vader and the subsequent hunt for a culprit, it might just be the most… interesting week of his life. He knew he didn't ask for the easy route when he asked his fried to get him in contact with the Rebellion, but Alderaan must be avenged, and slavery must be stopped.

He put a corrupt Imperial on the chopping block, taking down three birds with one stone: getting Vader off his back, getting rid of a corrupt Imperial, and opening an area for a rebel/ rebel sympathizer to come in. He was surprised Vader bought it, but the man has been subtly changing the past few days. Maybe he had been just as eager to get rid of him as Piett was.

Deep, rhythmic breathing filled the room suddenly (as if Piett summoned the devil), pulling Piett out of his thought and jerking him to attention. He shoves his thoughts from earlier out of his mind, not really wanting to be caught. Vader walked slowly into the room and sat down opposite of Piett at the same table.

"Sit, Admiral Piett."

Piett nods firmly, sitting down with precision, and not letting his surprise cross his face.

"I need you to use the secrecy I know you posses to help me with a mission that no one can know of. Do not worry, the cameras and mics in this room are disabled, we can speak freely. I need you to cover my absence, which will last around 2 weeks at most. Can you do it?"

Vader spoke with a softness that was so unlike him that it broke Piett's ability to keep a straight face as he let his eyes widen. Whatever the message did to this man was enough to turn him from a homicidal war machine into something more like a human, and he didn't know how to feel about it.

After a minute or so of just staring at Vader, Piett cleared his throat, and said, "I can do that sir. What should I tell the Emperor should he call?"

"That I have gone to hunt the Rebels by myself since I suspect that there are moles in my crew."

Piett nodded and accepted his task by Vader, knowing that he really did not have another option at this point. (He pushed down fears of Vader knowing that he worked with the Rebellion. Now was not the time.)

"Thank you, Admiral," Vader said, still in a surprisingly gentle tone while he stood. "You are the most competent man I know."

He headed for the door, but turned back toward Piett, and then said, "I know now that you let Luke Skywalker escape from your grasp twice. Thank you for taking care of my son."

He walks out of the room, leaving a shell-shocked Piett who just had three questions answered to him in that small sentence: 1) Vader's relationship with Skywalker, 2) that Vader knew of his deeds and possibly of his true allegiance, and 3) that Vader did indeed have a change of heart.

Not knowing how to handle the revelation, Piett ordered some whiskey. After that conversation, he needed a stiff drink.

As Piett drank a whole bottle of whiskey in under half an hour, Qui-Gon put his bucket of popcorn to the side and turned to an intruder of his enjoyment of his prank.

"Obi-Wan, I know you do not agree with what I did. I do not need-"

"I did not come to lecture you," his former student interrupted him with a raised hand. "I doubt it would work if I tried, at this point. I came to tell you that the twins have noticed the shift in the force and are asking questions. Do you want to tell them what you've done, or do you want them to wait till they meet their father?"

"Let them wait," Qui-Gon replied, turning back to the now hammered Admiral. "This is so much more fun."

1)I do not own Star Wars

2)Stay safe from the diseases going around my friends!

3)Sorry for taking too long to update. My computer went wonky and I haven't had time to work much on this because of college. I did not forget

4)I do not have a beta and am not really looking for one. I am writing because I enjoy it. Maybe I'll go back and rewrite somethings eventually to make them fit with the story that has evolved from this.

5)If y'all have any ideas for father, son, daughter pranks to play on the galaxy, please tell me! The Skywalker family is about to be reunited and y'all have had wonderful ideas so far.


	12. The Reveal

Luke watched his sister as she stood on a ridge, the same one he used to stand on when he lived here only a few years ago, watching the sunrise.

Walking up to her and putting a hand on her shoulder, he asked her a question that had been on his mind for the past few days.

"Are you sure you want to go through with the plan? I can do it if you don't want to be known just yet, and we did plan for that."

She looked up at him, with a small smile on her face.

"I can do it. Part of the reason behind the idea of the pranks, especially the ones that I carried out, was to come to terms with my heritage, and what he has done to me. He needs to know the full truth if he is to trust us, I want to be the one to tell him, and I want a family again."

Facing the sunrise, Luke nodded. Her logic made sense, and her taking down the absolutely corrupt Imperials in the Navy and Army did seem to help her, in a strange, convoluted way, giving him a feeling that she and Father were more similar than any of them thought. His feelings were usually right.

"It's going to be a hot day. Let's get out of the suns until it's time."

Leia nodded and followed Luke inside the abandoned homestead so that they will be as rested as possible if Vader decides that he wants to fight instead of listen. This plan had to work. They would have nothing else if it didn't.

A TIE fighter lands in front of the Lars' home a quarter of an hour before noon, which was unexpected by both Luke and Leia. Their father was nothing if not either prompt or incredibly in advance (but then this isn't a battle, both of them think. There isn't quite the stain and pressure here).

The black figure gets out and turns off the ship (both twins giggle a little at the fact that the song Luke programed it with still played) before turning and heading in the direction of Shmi Skywalker's grave. He kneels there until noon, not making a sound, showing incredible vulnerability for the right hand man of the Emperor (may he rot slowly over a thousand years). The man finally rises and brushes as much sand off as possible, verbalizing his dislike of the sand and the desert as quietly as possible, for a mechanized voice, which wasn't quiet at all.

'_It__'s time_,' said Luke through their Force connection.

'_I know._'

Leia walks up the stairs and out of the house to meet Vader. Nothing in the letter said that it would be Luke Skywalker meeting Vader, after all. Just that L Skywalker would. (Dead, unseen Jedi mutter and shake their heads at the fact that the twins must always be playing pranks, despite how serious this situation could become. Qui-Gon stands off to the side with some more popcorn at the ready.)

"Lord Vader, formerly known as Anakin Skywalker," Leia greets with a cool voice, giving nothing away.

"Princess," Vader bowed his head in greeting, equally cool in manner. "I was told I'd meet an L Skywalker here today."

"Yes you were. How can I help you?"

Luke slammed his face into his hands and let out an muffled groan. Of course Leia would make this as awkward as possible; she did think it was appropriate considering how her treated her on the Death Star and that it was unlikely that Vader would actually leave the Dark Side.

(Qui-Gon Jinn is, by this time, chowing down on some delicious, buttery popcorn.)

"If you would be so kind as to take me to L Skywalker, whom I assume is Luke Skywalker, could you do so?" Luke is certain Vader has never been more terse without murdering someone, although the reason why Luke thought so is absolutely wrong.

Vader just wanted to meet his son and hated the fact that Leia reminded him of choices he made that now seem horribly wrong. Luke thought Vader wanted to see him so that he could either do something violent or simply negotiate an end to the pranks.

"Ah. It is when you assume, Lord Vader, that you make mistakes. Why did you want to see me?"

(Luke thought that he was the only one who could hear the satisfaction in her voice, but Obi-Wan sneaks some of Qui-Gon's popcorn in preparation for the verbal battle that will soon follow. He raised a Skywalker. He knows how to read their voices.)

This brought Vader to a halt as he slowly enunciated, "What do you mean?"

"You really thought that Luke Skywalker was the only Skywalker left? You really are blind, aren't you! I may be legally an Organa, but biologically I am your daughter. I am surprised you did not see the resemblance to my mother when you had me aboard the Death Star, torturing me for information about the Rebellion, later blowing up my home planet and my adopted family. I am surprised you, a much more advanced practitioner of the Force, could not see with the Force what I see now, a connection that defies all logic and can only exist because of blood.

The desert is silent as Leia's words sank into the Sith that stood in front of her, his respirator the only thing making a sound. Luke prodded his sister to ask if she wanted him to come out at this point.

'Not yet. Let's see what he does with this information.'

And so they waited. And waited. And waited. Leia even came inside to get a small glass of water to cool down and finished it before going back outside, and Vader still hadn't moved. Now both the twins were worried about him possibly suffering from a heat stroke (the black armor could not be doing him any favors in the Tatooine heat). Finally Leia decided that it is time for Luke to come out of the house.

"Father," he said in a (hopefully) collected voice as he stood before the silent man. "Why did you want to meet with us?"

The helmet turned fractionally to look at Luke, before facing the sky and letting out something like a groan.

"Can we do this inside?" The deep, mechanical voice asked, finally seeming to have come out of whatever thought kept him hostage for so long.

"Yes," the twins respond in unison.

The odd trio walked, or stumbled, inside and out of the Tatooine heat and her suns. With his popcorn finished, thanks to Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon herds the other Jedi way. This was a family moment, and while he loved a good show, he wanted them to have some privacy just this once. Thank goodness he had started reintroducing Vader to the Light, even though the dead should never interfere with the lives of the living, otherwise he'd actually be concerned about Luke and Leia coming out of this alive or as Jedi.

It is night at the Lars homestead and the odd family of three are indoors, sitting at a table with some documents before them, incomprehensible to anyone but those three. The twins have finally finished telling Vader, their father, the entire story from when Obi-Wan first met Luke in a dream till the twins were standing before Vader just hours before. After the long tale is finished, they ask him if he has any questions or concerns, mentally preparing for the worst.

"So let me get this straight. You two are twins, have known basically since meeting each other, have known that I was your father, have been pranking the galaxy and taking out corrupt officers and other Imperials after learning about the Force from Yoda, to then take down the Emperor and reunite our family?"

"That is correct" Leia replied, still unsure if Vader taking the news this well was a good thing or not.

"And you want me to participate in pranking the universe with you?"

"Yep!" Luke, the ever cheerful one, smiled at the man in the mask before continuing. "They're good for family bonding and making Palpatine mad, as well as for making Mothma spiral into alcoholism."

Vader then seemed to come to a decision on this galaxy-altering-question they were asking him to answer quicker than even they did.

"Count me in."

Slightly surprised, Leia asked Vader, "Do you have any other questions?"

"Yes. Considering my expertise in prank playing because of the Clone Wars, may I help with the planning? I see some flaws in a few of these operations that are laid out."

The twins look at each other in shock, back at Vader, then grin simultaneously. While they were hoping that their father would help, they could not plan on it. Palpatine will not know what is coming.

Across the galaxy, ripples could be felt in the Force by those who know how to look. The dead Jedi who knew what was going on rejoiced, for the Skywalker family was reunited once more. Qui-Gon Jinn rejoiced because Anakin knew how to pull the best pranks and the times called for more popcorn, a new favorite of his. Exiled Jedi, who were still alive, gained a renewed sense of hope that the galaxy will be made right once more. Palpatine felt it and smashed a hot pink vase into the wall out of anger and fear. Yoda, as per his usual, was taking a nap.

1)This came out unusually fast, but I wanted to know how it would happen!

2)I do not own Star Wars

3)I have received some awesome prank ideas and some good encouragement. If y'all have any more ideas, please send them my way. I would love to hear them and see how they would fit in the story.

4)The timing is going to slow down quite a bit now, I think. This is the first turning point of the story, and I love Skywalker family bonding moments, so in subsequent chapters I will probably be including quite a bit of that.


End file.
